Doom & Gloom

Since I can't seem to bring myself to make an entry for today, at least not one in my series of character creation, I just thought I'd vent for a moment. I have all these RPGs; my count comes to 48, and those are just the ones within easy reach of my computer. Of those 48, I have played a grand total of 6 : D&D, Scion, Exalted, Big Eyes Small Mouth, Hunter: The Vigil and a short-lived game of Buffy. This may be a function of my lack of ability to connect with other gamers in real life, or my general ability to be rejected for every online game I've ever tried to join, or just the fact that I get frustrated easily and don't take setbacks well and this means any online games I try to run myself are virtually doomed to failure. I have a newfound respect for raid leaders in MMORPGs who have to manage to get 10, 25, or even more people together on a weekly basis for several hours at a time and can manage to hold the raid together, because I can't manage 4-5 people once every couple of weeks. Feel free to comment, but any comments about how I just don't try hard enough will be ignored, and deleted if possible; I feel like hell already, I don't need help in that area.